Bunkum discovered this FFFBI internal briefing. It turns out that Alphonse—the new typist in the Bureau's research office—messed up. (Apparently, his hooves make using the computer too tricky for him.)

Can you help?

Read the following 18 sentences. In each one, the name of an animal has been replaced. Can you identify the missing animals?

1. A college student will usually sleep for 19 hours every day.
see answer

2. A mortgage broker will often kill its lunch by squeezing it to death.
see answer

3. A teenager can't change its spots.
see answer

4. All celebrity gossip columnists have retractable claws.
see answer

5. Ankara is the capital of Chicken.
see answer

6. Beware the wolf in Tommy Hilfiger's clothing.
see answer

7. If a Frenchman stands on his hands, he may be about to spray you with a very stinky juice.
see answer

8. If you look at a car's license plate, you'll often see the squished remains of lobsters.
see answer

9. If you shine a light at night on a porch, you'll soon be surrounded by actors.
see answer

10. In 1976, a talking carrot produced over 800 words.
see answer

11. It's a strange fact that Canadians can change the color of their bodies at will.
see answer

12. Many patent attorneys consume termites by sticking their long noses into termite mounds.
see answer

13. Many statues in our cities are covered in guano, which is a fancy word for pig poop.
see answer

14. Some doctors in the 1800s used kindergartners to suck supposedly infected blood out of patients.
see answer

15. Some Xerox machines have been known to produce over 20 offspring a year.
see answer

16. The largest egg in the world is laid by the Vice President of the United States.
see answer

17. Who doesn't like to take a bite out of a hot rhinoceros?
see answer

18. Sumo wrestlers can bloat their bodies to scare away an enemy.
see answer

ANSWERS:
(scroll up to get back to the questions)

1. koala bear  (A koala will usually sleep for 19 hours every day. Students sleep more.)

2. boa constrictor  (A boa constrictor is the big squeezer.)

3. leopard  (A leopard can't change its spots. Teenagers can barely change their socks.)

4. cats  (All cats have retractable claws. Me-owww.)

5. Turkey  (Ankara is the capital of Turkey. Gobble gobble.)

6. sheep  (Beware the wolf in sheep's clothing. Do sheep shrink if their wool gets wet?)

7. skunk  (It's skunks who do that. But avoid upside-down Frenchmen, just in case.)

8. bugs  (It's bugs you'll find. Very few lobsters.)

9. moths  (If you shine a light at night on a porch, it'll be moths. If you have a camera, you might get actors.)

10. parrot  (That's parrot, not carrot.)

11. chameleons  (Chameleons can change color. Canadians are good at other things.)

12. anteaters  (Anteaters have long tongues, so they're really good at getting that last bit of jelly out of a jar.)

13. bird  (Pigeons! Coo!)

14. leeches  (Doctors used leeches. Kindergartners are better at sucking spilled candy out of furniture.)

15. rabbits  (Rabbits, not rabbis.)

16. ostrich  (The largest egg in the world is laid by the ostrich. The Vice President almost never lays eggs these days.)

17. dog  (Hot dogs! Rhinoceros is a little tougher.)

18. porcupine fish  (Porcupine fish can puff up to scare away an enemy.)